Colin Barry

Values, Principles, and Boundaries (ALD, Thursday, Week 6)


Espoused values (aspirational/how you think you should be) vs. lived values ("in use"/patterns of behavior)
Is it really what you value if you don't live your life that way?

The best way to live your values is to translate them into actionable commitments. If you are content to let values remain fluffy ideals, you will not live them. You will break them.
Ex. Responsibility > Achievement => I will not demean my employees or neglect their growth to further my own achievement.
OR Faith > Ambition => I will not work or compete in sports on Sundays (Clay Christensen).

Another technique: find safe places to exercise boundary-following and develop your self-control.
Ex. If you golf a lot, always play the ball where it lies. Not because taking a free drop is necessarily cheating (if you're playing casually, it probably isn't) but because self-control and fortitude are muscles that atrophy with lack of use.

Another technique: Surround yourself with people who value similar things. We have a dangerous tendency to adopt the norms of the people around us.